Tag Archives: new

Back on my Game

Man, this whole going back to work while keeping the rest of life going thing is no joke.

I realize I have no children and only 500 square feet to care for but please understand what I did not before now.  It has been over THREE YEARS since I have had to leave the house to work. I have been able to try and care for myself while keeping house, laundry, errands and 100% of the cooking from scratch.

I had also forgotten how much energy working with the public and the pained takes out of you. I actually really love the work. I love helping people get well, helping them stay on track amd working with positive,  health-minded people.

It’s just tough sometimes. Being a highly sensitive person doesn’t help either.  It takes a lot of energy to learn all the new systems and procedures all while helping patients. I feel things from patients and staff that might be completely unrelated but…painful or negative all the same. I am hard on myself when I make a mistake, despite the fact I have only had 2.5 days of actual training.

I am struggling to remain focused sometimes, I’ll admit. I forget to eat. I feel scattered. I think that might be normal when there are two people waiting in front of you, you’re on the phone, the second line is blinking, other staff are buzzing around, you’re still learning to manage the six schedules and a beeper is going off to tell you need to take a patient from their room. Just maybe a scattered brain could be understood.

I come home at 8:30pm on work days and I am USELESS. I swear. I want to get up and cook because it makes me happy but my brain is mush, my body is tired and my feet ache. Oh, I am also usually STARVING.

So, all of you super Moms out there…I SALUTE YOU. Holy cow. You really are amazing and super. You give, give, give…and so rarely get. You deserve so much love, support and respect.

Thank you all for the continued support. I’m sorry to not be around a lot right now…but I hope you understand. I miss you all. I worry that someone needs supporting and I am not there,  most of all.

I’ll get in my groove. I am only part time and it isn’t enough sadly, but I am SO grateful for this job. I love the office and the staff. I love the patients I get to help. It will get better. I’ll get stronger and will figure out my way.

Do you have any tips for meal prepping ahead? Any tips on saving your energy? Any great packed lunches or quick breakfasts you love? 

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New York Observations 1.0

I can honestly say that I had NO CLUE what I would be getting myself into when I jumped into this move to New York City. I knew that it would be a bit of culture shock to move from Vancouver, BC to NYC, being that it’s another country and all but I figured that living in Worcester and Boston would prepare me. It’s another big city, how different could it really be? Hah. So different my friends. So, so different.

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The day we showed up, we ran around for hours trying to get keys for the apartment that we had never seen. You heard that right, we rented an apartment based on photos from a broker without even stepping foot inside. Oh, we also paid the full year upfront, in advance. Hah. Put that in the “Risks Sarah Probably Won’t Take Again” column. When we finally got to the apartment, we were tired, hungry and just not in good places on our own.  The place looked dingy, things were falling apart, no one spoke English in the area and I lost it. I melted down and we ended up driving back to Connecticut and staying in the hotel we’d stayed in the night before. I cried for hours. HOURS. I couldn’t stop thinking about feeling unsafe. I knew this was the right move for my husband but…what had I gotten myself into?

The next day, after some breakfast and a relaxing morning, we went to the apartment. It looked completely different in the daylight. I had spent a lot of time during the night trying to figure out how much of my tears were legitimate and how much was simply because it was DIFFERENT. I had lived in a quiet neighbourhood in Vancouver with very different demographics. This just wasn’t what I was used to and I worked hard to tell myself to open up and just…be.  It helped. It helped a lot as we started to figure out our way around things. I didn’t feel great, but I felt like I could do it in comparison to the night before when I was ready to pack my bags and go home.

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The one thing that I honestly have been shocked by is how NICE people have been. There is a stereotype out there of New Yorkers being jerks or cold and so far, I just haven’t found that. Sure, in Midtown Manhattan people have been a bit…brisk but in general? People have been kind. Every checkout person has a chat with me. Every server has joked about my husband’s superman t-shirt or my Redsox hat. I’ve had homeless people tell me I was beautiful and to have a great day. I’ve watched people give freely and generously to people asking for money on the subway.  It just really wasn’t the welcome that I had expected and I feel like a complete ass to have expected differently.

What I’m saying is that we have so many preconceived ideas of people, places and things. I consider myself a pretty open person in general. I try not to judge but I’m human. We all are. We don’t MEAN to judge often times but it happens. I expected people to not give a crap about us in any way. I expected gruff interactions. I didn’t expect casual conversations and smiles. That’s on me for buying into the stereotype and the stories. I was scared of my new neighbourhood and was fearful. That’s on me too, for trusting my fears, my inexperience, the unknown rather than giving the benefit of the doubt.

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I’m going to make my best effort to give people more of a chance than I have given in the past. I’m going to do my best to contribute to this community in some way. I’m going to make it here and I’m going to make it my home.
But I’ll never be a Yankees fan. 

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Sox Fan for Life! (Taken at Yankee Stadium)